Five NBA Things I may or may not have Liked: Poole Party, Coming Up Empty, Not What the Doc Ordered, Rivalry Week, Buss Family Blues

My favorite and least least favorite things from the week that was

Poole Party

Jordan Poole isn’t a divisive player anymore, but that’s because everyone has accepted that he’s just a maddeningly frustrating player. Everything that can make him great– the insane, audacious shot-making– is also what makes him a borderline replacement-level player. However, if Poole isn’t on your team, and you can just dip your toe in the deep end whenever it suits you, he’s one of the most entertaining players in the league, and this ridiculousness is exactly why.

Honestly, I have no idea what was going through Poole’s head. The Pelicans are down 112-100 with four minutes left in the game, and he’s on a fastbreak to cut it to ten. The Pelicans are still probably going to lose, but these points matter if they want any chance of reversing their fortunes. As he catches the ball, he looks back to check on Josh Okogie, Houston’s lone retreating defender, and decides an off-the-backboard pass to one of his two trailing teammates is the best course of action.

Since Poole’s plan failed, the play looks so horribly wrong that you question his mental state. My assumption is that Poole believed Okogie would contest his shot, and instead of risking a chase-down block, he opted to toss it off the backboard, which would not only look dope as shit but would also wipe Okogie completely out of the play. Unfortunately, Okogie knew the score and knew risking an and-one with a low-probability contest was not a great idea.

I’m sure Pelicans fans hate Jordan Poole. I hated him on the Wizards, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t good for basketball. At the end of the day, the NBA is a massive entertainment corporation, and players like Poole understand that too well. There are many different universes where this play comes off, and Poole looks like a genius, but in ours, he looks like a fool. Never change Jordan Poole, unless you join my team, then, for the love of god, you must change.

Hawks Coming Up Empty

There’s nothing I love more than an under-the-radar streak, and the Hawks treated me to an absolutely insane one on Monday. Facing the Milwaukee Bucks, the Hawks began the game by missing their first 21 3-pointers. I have no idea if that’s a record to start a game, but it has to be damn close. The only thing that saved them from a three-less first half was a single C.J. McCollum triple, which got them to 1 of 22. Unsurprisingly, they were down 54-38, which was not nearly a large enough lead for the Bucks, considering the circumstances.

Fortunately, the Hawks made the undefeated halftime adjustment of “hit your shots,” and went 11 of 20 from three in the second half, almost stealing the game from the Bucks. People complain about how basketball can feel like a 3-point variance contest, and they’re not wrong, but I do enjoy how every team can shoot its way back into a game.

Not What the Doc Ordered

The NBA game has clearly passed Doc Rivers by, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t still a gem. He has based social takes, which counts for a lot in my book, and the man might have the best “WTF did I just watch face” in the league. As far as content goes, Rivers is still an A+ coach, and he had the perfect reaction to one of the worst defensive plays I’ve seen in a long time.

Doc’s reaction says it all. He literally cannot believe what he just witnessed, and honestly, I don’t blame him. The guilty party, Gary Harris, is a 12-season NBA veteran, and made the most amateur mistake of all time. The Bucks had the Hawks exactly where they wanted them. Six seconds on the shot clock, and in the corner with two defenders draped all over the ball. All the Bucks needed to do was stand relatively close to their men, and the Hawks would be forced into a late shot clock grenade. Instead, Harris decides that over half of the players on the court need to be in the same corner and abandons the inbounder, Dyson Daniels, right below the basket. What looked to be an excellent defensive position suddenly turned into a wide-open dunk. If Doc ever gets back into broadcasting, I want a picture-in-picture of his face the whole game.

Rivalry Week

The NBA’s Amazon Web Services Rivalry Week is, without a doubt, one of the funniest, most contrived pieces of marketing. The thing about rivalries is that they need no introduction, explanation, or justification. Rivalries are rivalries because they’re rivalries, which is what makes NBA.com’s Everything You Need to Know propaganda so charmingly ridiculous.

Here are a few of my favorite quotes from it. I want to stress that I am in no way trying to ridicule Sidra Khan, who wrote this, as they were given the impossible task of making shit up for their dumbass bosses and corporate partners.

“The NBA introduced a new twist to the regular season in 2022 by dedicating a week in January to classic and emerging rivalries between teams and players…, delivering 11 nationally televised games packed with marquee matchups, heightened intensity and bragging rights on the line.”

On Cavaliers at Hornets, “A classic Eastern Conference matchup, Cavaliers–Hornets games showcase emerging guard talent and a growing mini-rivalry.”

On Thunder at Bucks, “As Oklahoma City has emerged as a rising contender behind Shai Gilgeous-Alexander, matchups with Giannis Antetokounmpo now reflect the league’s shifting balance of power.”

Warriors at Mavericks, “Another high-stakes clash between the Warriors and Mavericks helped ignite a rivalry, stemming from their 2022 Western Conference Finals matchup, when Golden State defeated Dallas 4-1.”

Look, some of these are sort of rivalries, but how the fuck are you doing a rivalry week that doesn’t feature a showdown between the Boston Celtics and Los Angeles Lakers? The Bucks have a geographic beef with the Bulls. Shit, the Nets and Knicks played this week, and apparently, that isn’t a rivalry game.

I personally think a rivalry week is a good idea for the NBA, but they kind of need to deliver real rivalries. Does that mean some teams won’t be a part of the “festivities?” Absolutely, and that’s what makes real rivalries special. They take years of bad blood to gestate. You can’t just say Giannis vs Jokic is a rivalry because they’re both good. You need them to actually fucking hate each other, and if they don’t, well, I know shit sure Giannis hates the Bulls and Pacers. Rivalry week is a good idea, but poorly executed.

The Buss Family Blues

If you haven’t read Baxter Holmes’ story on the Buss family, then you’re missing out on some of the most off-the-wall, insane family dysfunction. I don’t want to spoil it, but the reporting in here is amazing. I strongly encourage you to read it. That family is a feudal mess.

For any inquiries about work, discussion, and the like, you can email me at nevin.l.brown@gmail.com.